B-17 Queen of the Skies ---The Ameritrash War---Mission 1

I have started a Campaign game of B-17 Queen of the Skies. This is a solitaire game and I will record the sessions here for your enjoyment. To add some humor and color I will be flying my bombing raids in the Ameritrash War with most of the targets being Euro Game factories. The crew will be familiar to you and I hope to try for the impossible and complete 25 missions. This is extremely hard to do in this game but maybe I will get lucky!


Preparations:

I will be flying a B-17 named the Cube Confused Bitch with a sexy suggestive female on the nose cone in true Ameritrash fashion

The Crew:

Pilot: Captain Steve Weeks
Co-pilot: Lieut. Matt Thrower
Bombardier: Lieut. Michael "Hellfire" Barnes
Navigator: Lieut. Uba Rose
Engineer: Master Sgt. Malloc
Radio Operator: Sgt. Ken Bradford
Ball Turrent: Sgt. Derk Solko
Port Waist: Sgt. Tom Hancock
Tail Gunner: Sgt. Frank "Skeletor" LaTerra

This plane was almost never airborne due to the fact that we could not find a Ball Turret gunner. Nobody wanted this most dangerous spot until the spot was filled by Derk Solko. Derk lost a game of Tichu to Captain Weeks and was forced aboard! (whatever)

Mission 1: 6:00am England

Captain Steve Weeks was awakened by a quick shake from Co-pilot Matt Thrower

"Wake up mate, briefing room in 5 minutes"

This was it. Our first mission with a crew full of ego centric maniacs. How the hell this group was going to work as a team I had no idea. All I know is that I was lucky as Hell to draw Matt Thrower as co pilot, his skills are beyond dispute.

As I shaved in the mirror, daybreak was coming up and I wondered if this damn war would ever end. The only chance for this war to be put in the history books was for our squadron to be successful. Bombing the piss out of those Euro game complexes would put the lid on those meeple maniacs once and for all.

I put on my leather jacket and went outside and headed for the briefing room. Michael "Hellfire" Barnes was outside taking the last few drags off a Lucky Strike.

"This is it Weeks, I finally get to drop a shitload of bombs on one of those Cube factories!"

I looked at Barnes with cold eyes and said,

"That's Captain Weeks..."

Everyone was there in the briefing room wondering where this first mission would take us. My guess is that it would be a candy ass run because there was no way they would risk this unruly crew on any mission of REAL importance.

General Petersen walks in and everybody gets real quiet. The tension can be cut with a butter knife.

"Gentlemen, this is where your training will finally pay off. You first mission must be a success. We are counting on a crushing blow here. I know some of you think you are hot shit but leave your egos in this room and don't take them on that airplane.

On that plane it is all business ALL the time!!!"

General Petersen pulls down the map of Europe.

"Your first Mission will be to this target in Lille, France. There is a Euro game factory complex in the town that needs your attention Gentlemen, if you know what I mean."

A gleam comes into Barnes' eyes as he whispers,

"Hell Yes!"

"Weather reports are good and you leave immediately, Good luck!"

The CC Bitch will be flying in the middle of the formation and at the high position in the squadron.

Matt Thrower speaks,

"All systems go for takeoff Captain"

The CC Bitch takes off in the dawn sky and heads toward the target of Lille, France.

The CC Bitch flies over Zone 1 which is still over land in England with no problems, weather is good and the crew is strangely quiet.

The plane enters Zone 2 over the English Channel. The squadron has Good fighter cover so there are no problems so far. Matt Thrower turns to me and says,

"Nervous mate?"

I reply,

"Not really, but you wanna know what really makes me nervous?"

I point to the Bombardier, Michael Barnes who is reading a "Hellboy" comic book.

Matt Thrower sports a ever so slight smile.

The CC Bitch enters the target zone over France. Ken Bradford yells over the radio,

"Captain!! Two German Cube pushers spotted!!!!!"

Two ME 110's appear. One ME 110 at 12'oclock low and one ME 110 at 10:30 low

"Let's hope that fighter cover holds"

The crew mans the guns and watches as the fighters chase off the two German planes.

"Approaching target Captain, clear weather."

"Hang on boys, here comes the flak!!!"

As the CC Bitch approaches the target a huge burst of flak nearly hits the starboard side but misses, another burst again on the same side misses again.

Derk screams from the ball turret

"I knew I shouldn't have had those Belgian waffles this morning!!!!!!!" SHIT!!!"

A final huge burst of flak misses the CC Bitch as the plane arrives over the target.

"Ok, Barnes, do that magic you do so well"

Barnes laughs and releases the bombs.

"Bombs away!!!!!!!!"

Matt Thrower speaks,

"Damage assessment Mr. Barnes?"

Barnes replies,

"SHIT!!! , I got the right side of that Meeple shithouse but some of it is still standing, 20% destroyed."

"Ok, lets get the hell out of here!!!", says Captain Weeks

The CC Bitch turns around for her trip back to England. The plane makes it back out of Zone 3 with no trouble.

Skeletor speaks from the tail gun position,

"Hey Barnes, maybe if you put that fucking comic book down you could destroy the whole factory next time!"

"FUCK YOU!" says Barnes

Matt Thrower's eyebrow goes up like Spock as he glances back at the tail gunner.

Ken Bradford speaks,

"What a crew , eh Captain??

"As you were Sgt." as Captain Weeks approaches England

"Ready for landing Captain", says Matt Thrower.

"Weather is clear, we have a good approach."

The CC Bitch lands and has completed its first mission. Will the CC Bitch make 25 missions? Place your bets and stay tuned to find out!!!

Great report! Don't blame Barnes - a %20 hit ration isn't sore.

This game while not elegant is pure drama. I have to dig up my record sheets and awake the memories. I named my crew after Catch-22 characters and the bomber Asparagus and three of the initial crew survived 25 missions. Okay, I cheated once when Flak hit the plane in the Bomb Bay and the whole bomber exploded. The tail gunner Snowden became an ace with - I think - 12 kills.

It's been some time since I played the game, but I think since the formations early in the war were smaller there aren't any top or low flying bombers until mission 6 (or 11?).

It's been some time since I played the game, but I think since the formations early in the war were smaller there aren't any top or low flying bombers until mission 6 (or 11?).

Thanks, you are right. Fortunately it had no effect on the outcome

Skeletor is in the bar relaxing with a Carlton Cold Beer when Captain Weeks shouts

"Let's go! They want us back in the briefing room NOW"

"It is a shame to waste a beer like this but duty calls!", says Skeletor

Crew for Mission 2:

The Crew:

Pilot: Captain Steve Weeks
Co-pilot: Lieut. Matt Thrower
Bombardier: Lieut. Michael "Hellfire" Barnes
Navigator: Lieut. Uba Rose
Engineer: Master Sgt. Malloc
Radio Operator: Sgt. Ken Bradford
Ball Turrent: Sgt. Derk Solko
Port Waist: Sgt. Tom Hancock
Tail Gunner: Sgt. Frank "Skeletor" LaTerra



General Petersen wastes no time in pulling down the map of Europe.

"Gentlemen your first run was not bad, 20% damage to a meeple factory is a good start but we want total destruction that is why we are sending you guys right back to the same target to finish the job. We are betting on the fact that the Germans won't be expecting us to hit the very same target."

"Your Target is once again the Industrial Euro Game factory in Lille, France. You leave immediately, we have good weather and we want it to hold. Good Luck

Barnes zips up his leather jacket as the meeting concludes and stuffs the "Hellboy" comic inside. Skeltor reaches in Barnes' jacket and grabs the comic and tosses it in the trash.

"Let's leave the comics here this time, You gotta a job to do!"

Barnes screams,

"I was gonna put that issue on ebay!! It's worth $200!!!"

Matt Thrower sips on some Earl Gray tea and speaks,

"All systems go for takeoff Captain"

The CC Bitch takes off on Mission 2 headed for the target in Lille, France.

As the CC Bitch enters Zone 2 over the English Channel she falls into a loose formation and she encounters two ME 109's

One 109 at 10:30 level and the other at 12:00 level, also a ME 110 joins the wave at 10:30 low

The CC Bitch has good fighter support and all 3 planes are driven off.

Skeletor shouts,

"I suppose I should be thankful for this good fighter support but I swear I do have an itchy trigger finger that needs scratching!"

Barnes replies,

"Scratch your ass!!!"

The crew chuckles

The CC Bitch Enters Zone 3 the target zone and encounters another wave of German fighters. Two ME 109's, one at 12:00 level and the other at 1:30 low

Once again the good fighter support drives off both planes.

Skeletor speaks,

"I should have bought a comic book myself!"

"You spoke too soon, Skeletor!", says Ken Bradford

A second wave of German fighters attacks the CC Bitch and this time it is Four ME 109's!!!

"Holy Shit this place is crawling with Meeple maniacs!!!", says Skeletor

One ME 109 at 12:00 high another at 12 level a third at 10:30 high and the fourth at 1:30 high

Good fighter support drives off two fighters at 12:00 but two ME 109's remain to be dealt with.

Uba and Malloc fire at the ME 109's but they miss.

The ME 109 at 10:30 High fires a burst at the CC Bitch.

2 shells from this ME 109 hit the plane!

The first shell hits the nose of the CC Bitch.

Barnes yells,

"SHITTTTTTTT"

Captain Weeks speaks,

"You hit Barnes?"

Barnes replies,

"Shit no, those pussies can't hit me but they did a hell of a job on the bomb controls, I'm afraid they are inoperable!"

Matt Thrower speaks,

"Blimey!"

The Second shell from the ME 109 hits the pilot compartment!!!

Engineer malloc screams!!!!

"AHHHHHHHHHHH"

Matt Thrower speaks,

"Malloc, you OK?"

"Yes, sir, just a light wound in the leg, I'm OK!"

The ME 109 at 1:30 fires but misses does the successive attack of the ME 109 at 10:30

Captain Weeks speaks,

"Gentlemen, I am aborting the mission!"

Barnes yells like a banshee but the Captain ignores him.

The CC Bitch turns around and runs into yet another wave of fighters.

This time a single ME 109 at 12 high., which is easily driven off by the good fighter support.

The CC Bitch flies back into Zone 1 over the English Channel without any trouble and then with good weather lands safely.

Two beautiful nurses help Malloc off the plane and attend to his wounded leg. Matt Thrower speaks to one of the nurses,

"You know it was a long flight and I have this crick in my neck!"

The nurses shrug off Matt.

Barnes exits the plane in a huff and blasts Captain Weeks saying he could have dropped the bombs manually. It turns out Barnes was correct but the chances of him hitting the target were extremely slim.

It was probably a bad decision by Captain Weeks and the really bad thing is that this mission will not count toward the completion of the 25 missions.

Skeletor speaks to Barnes as they head to the debriefing room,

"I say we give Captain Weeks just one more chance!"

My agent keeps asking why I don't have more lines. I told him, "YOU DON'T KNOW HIM! YOU DON'T KNOW HIM~!!!"

My agent keeps asking why I don't have more lines. I told him, "YOU DON'T KNOW HIM! YOU DON'T KNOW HIM~!!!"

As Schweig points out above, this game is pure drama! I am responding to the game and what is happening aboard the plane.

If there is action in the Radio Room, you will be at center stage !

I hope you make it through 25 missions Ken, if anyone can make it, YOU can!

the*mad*gamer wrote:

My agent keeps asking why I don't have more lines. I told him, "YOU DON'T KNOW HIM! YOU DON'T KNOW HIM~!!!"

As Schweig points out above, this game is pure drama! I am responding to the game and what is happening aboard the plane.

If there is action in the Radio Room, you will be at center stage !

I hope you make it through 25 missions Ken, if anyone can make it, YOU can!

Aye aye! Hope to be fit for duty, sir! And not die in a horribly humiliating fashion such as falling out of the airplane, sir!

the*mad*gamer wrote:

If there is action in the Radio Room, you will be at center stage !

There hardly is any action in the radio room. It is hard to hit and the radio operator can only fire at planes coming in from 12 o'clock high. During my 25 missions I guess my radio operator only fired his machine gun once. At least he survived all 25 flights.

Today my B-29 Superfortress game arrived, so I can't wait to start another hopefully successful 25 missions!

MISSION 3

The Crew:

Pilot: Captain Steve Weeks
Co-pilot: Lieut. Matt Thrower
Bombardier: Lieut. Michael "Hellfire" Barnes
Navigator: Lieut. Uba Rose
Engineer: Master Sgt. Malloc
Radio Operator: Sgt. Ken Bradford
Ball Turrent: Sgt. Derk Solko
Port Waist: Sgt. Tom Hancock
Tail Gunner: Sgt. Frank "Skeletor" LaTerra


It was quite awhile before the CC Bitch had her 3rd Mission. My guess was that General Petersen sensed the conflict between the crew and was having doubts about sending us on another mission but the war was too important! The General knows like that rest of us that if the Meeples spread to the US it would mean disaster.

The time off gave the crew a chance to unwind and get in several games of "Titan"

But before we knew it we were back in the briefing room.

General Petersen points at the map of Europe while speaking,

"Gentlemen, this time we have a small change in strategy. We are sending the CC Bitch to Cherbourg. Your target is an airfield. Our intelligence tells us that the Germans plan to use this airfield as the primary export station for most of the Euro games produced in the country. Your mission is to destroy that airfield! Good Luck"

As the engines start up on the CC Bitch, Matt Thrower speaks,

"Captain, I don't like how Engine #1 is acting"

"It will settle in Matt, we can't afford to waste any time!"

So the CC Bitch takes off for Cherbourg. The CC Bitch is flying in the middle of the formation.

The Plane flies into Zone 2 and is immediately greeted by enemy fighters.

Ken Bradford speaks,

"Captain, we got trouble already!"

Skeletor cracks his knuckles

One FW 190 at 10:30 High and a ME 110 in a Vertical climb

Derk speaks,

"That bastard in the 110 is trying to crawl up my ass!!!"

Derk is the only one with a shot on the ME 110 but before he can fire both planes are driven off by Good fighter cover.

"Whatever"

The CC Bitch enters Zone 3 the target zone and encounters a new wave of enemy fighters.

Two ME 110's one at 6 level and one at 9 low both driven off by fighter cover.

Another wave soon follows,

Three ME 109's one at 12 level, one at 12 high and another at 1:30 level all 3 are driven off by fighter cover

Matt Thrower speaks,

"Those boys are earning their pay!"

Yet another wave comes,

Barnes speaks,

"Shit we are approaching the target, get these guys!!!!"

Two ME 109's one at 10:30 level and one at 12 level and a ME 110 at 10:30 low

Fighters drive off the ME 109 at 12 level and 10:30 level but that leaves one enemy plane to be dealt with.

Uba and Malloc fire at the plane at 10:30 low and miss!

The ME 110 returns fire and hits the CC Bitch with one shell to the nose!!!
Barnes hits the deck as the shell wizzes by him!!

"SON OF A BITCH!!! Those bastards took out the bomb controls again!!! They are inoperable!"

Captain Weeks speaks,

"What the hell??? Are those controls made of plastic???"

The ME 110 turns for a successive attack at 1:30 level

Uba fires again and misses!!!

The ME 110 fires and misses!!

"Approaching target Captain"

"Barnes, looks like you get your wish this time, you get to drop those bombs manually"

A bead of sweat rolls off Barnes brow as he smiles nervously.

"Weather over target good Captain"

"Here comes the Flak!!!"

Light Flak over target, the 2nd burst of Flak hits with 4 shells to the plane!

The first shell hits the nose, Barnes oxygen supply is hit but still workable, the 2nd shell hits the port wing with no effect, the 3rd shell hits the tail and with superficial damage and the 4th shell hits the Bomb bay doing just superficial damage

Barnes drops the bombs manually and he is OFF TARGET.

"SHIT!!!!!!"

"Damage assesment Mr. Barnes"

One Fucking Goose Egg , 0.00%!!!

The CC Bitch turns around for the return trip and runs into three ME 110's

One at 12 low , another at 10:30 level and the third at 6 low

Fighter cover chases off the plane at 12 low.

Skeletor fires at the plane at 6 low and kills it!!!

"YEeeeeeeeeeeesssss"

Captain Weeks speaks,

"Don't get cocky kid!"

The plane at 10:30 survives and hits the nose of the CC Bitch putting out Uba's compartment heat!!!

Malloc screams,

"Captain we gotta drop down Uba will freeze!!!"

"Uba you gotta hang on, I'm not dropping out of formation"

"Yessssss, siiiiiir" says Uba shivering

Malloc in a rage fires at the ME 110 at hits it and it flies off.

As the CC Bitch flies over the English Channel it is surrounded by 5 FW 190's!!!

They are at 12 high, 1:30 high, 3 high, 6 high and 9 high

3 are driven off by fighter cover

Skeletor fires at the FW 190 at 6 high and kills it!

"I want a raise Captain!!!" smiles Skeletor who is well on his way to being an Ace!!!

The other FW 190 misses and flies off

The weather over the base is good and the CC Bitch lands.

Uba is freezing but luckily did not get frostbite.

Captain Weeks hands Uba a bottle of bourbon,

"This will warm you up!!!"

Uba smiles.

Don't get cocky kid

Classic line

Great report by the way..might have to search this game out on ebay.

Steve, you bully, in case of heating malfunction I always drop down to lower altitude when under fighter coverage. Frostbite is a nasty thing.

Otherwise, I hope you don't forget that Skelly the tail gunner can fire a passing shot (hit only on 6) at any fighter coming in from 1.30, 10.30 or 12 o'clock as long as the Intercom is working. This passing shot is done after the fighters attack though. And don't forget that successfully attacking Krauts return for another wave! I hope I don't bother you with all that ...

Otherwise, I hope you don't forget that Skelly the tail gunner can fire a passing shot (hit only on 6) at any fighter coming in from 1.30, 10.30 or 12 o'clock as long as the Intercom is working. This passing shot is done after the fighters attack though. And don't forget that successfully attacking Krauts return for another wave! I hope I don't bother you with all that ...

I got all that , thanks but I do have a question for you.

Let's take this situation:

We have a German fighter at 1:30 high and another at 12:00 level.


The top turret guns aim at the 1:30 high as does the starboard waist gun.

The Nose gun aims at the fighter at 12 level.

Let's say the starboard waist gun fires and kills the fighter at 1:30 high.

Can the top turret gun then fire at the German fighter at 12:00 high or is all fire from the B-17 considered simultaneous?

Mission 4

The Crew:

Pilot: Captain Steve Weeks
Co-pilot: Lieut. Matt Thrower
Bombardier: Lieut. Michael "Hellfire" Barnes
Navigator: Lieut. Uba Rose
Engineer: Master Sgt. Malloc
Radio Operator: Sgt. Ken Bradford
Ball Turrent: Sgt. Derk Solko
Port Waist: Sgt. Tom Hancock
Tail Gunner: Sgt. Frank "Skeletor" LaTerra


General Petersen is not happy. He is pacing back and forth as he lectures the crew of the CC Bitch in the briefing room.

"How in the hell can you miss twice in a row?? You have flown two wasted missions back to back!

I ought to send the whole lot of you to the kitchen and peel potatoes for the rest of this friggin' war! But I can't do that because we are short on planes and men as it is!!!"

OK, new business. I'm sending you turkeys up one more time and THIS time you better connect!!!

Your target is Aircraft in Meaulte. These aircraft are the ones kicking your butts up there so maybe if we bomb them to hell you can get through on some missions!!! GOOD LUCK!"

Matt Thrower speaks to Captain Weeks as they board the plane.

"He was rather in a twitt wasn't he?"

Captain Weeks shrugs as he spots Uba loading a case of Bourbon on the plane.

"Ready for take off Captain"

The CC Bitch is in the Tail position, a dangerous spot which almost seems like punishment for the last failed mission.

The CC Bitch flies out of England over the English Channel in Zone 2 with no problems

The plane then pulls into Zone 3 the target Zone and they run into some poor weather.

Ken speaks,

"I didn't think this good weather would hold!"

(Lighting strike)

5 ME 109's appear out of nowhere to assult the CC Bitch

They are positioned at 12 low, 12 level, 12 high and 9 high and 6 High

Good fighter cover drive off 3 of the fighters.

Tom Hancock fires at the ME 109 at 9:00 and hits! The plane is damaged but not destroyed!

Skeletor balks,

"Don't be a wanker Tommy Boy, blow the shit out of those planes!!!"

Malloc yells,

"Shut the fuck up Frank!"

Malloc fires at the same plane and finishes the job, he destroys it as it spirals down in a flume of smoke.

Barnes fires at the ME 109 at 12 H and misses.

The ME 109 at 12 H fires and hits the CC Bitch with 2 shells. One shell to the nose with no damage and the other shell hits the Tail turret making the tail guns inoperable.

Skeletor screams!!!

"Nobody shuts down my guns!!!"

Skeletor then throws his Crocodile Dundee knife at the passing plane.

Ken Bradford speaks,

"Skeletor, you are fucking nuts!"

The remaining ME 109's miss on their passes as the CC Bitch approached the target.

Captain Weeks speaks,

"Do you think you can hit the target in this weather Barnes?"

(thunder, provided by the Euro Overlord)

Barnes replies,

"We will know soon enough!"

"Looks like the poor weather has got the Cube Pushers indoors sir, NO Flak!", says Matt

"Well that's one positive note!", says the Captain

Barnes drops the bombs right on target!

"Damage assessment Mr. Barnes?" Matt inquires

50 fuckin' Percent!!!!!

The crew applauds!

"Very good Barnes", says the Captain

The CC Bitch turns around and heads for home but not without trouble.

6 109's appear and virtually surround the B-17!!!

They are position at 12 level, 3 high, 1:30 high, 6 high, 6 high and one in a vertical dive

Ken Bradford radios the fighters to concentrate on the tail enemies since Skeletor’s guns are out

Good fighter cover drives off the tail enemies.

Barnes fires at the ME 109 at 12 level, he hits and Kills it as it explodes in a ball of fire!!!

Uba fires at the plane at 1:30 and misses

Malloc fires at the ME 109 at 3:00 High , he hits it and watches the plane explode!!!

The rest of the ME 109's miss or where driven off in the next successive attack

Another wave of German fighters quickly develops. Two ME 110's one at 12 low and the other at 10:30 low and a single ME 109 at 6 High

Good fighter cover drives off the ME 110 at 10:30 low and the ME 109 at 6 High

Derk speaks,

"That ME 110 at 12 low is all mine!!!"

The ball turret spins as Derk wearing yellow goggles and a rather nerdy hat takes aim at the plane.

Derk fires and hits!!!!

The plane spins out of control, smoking, and then explodes!!

Derk opens his PDA and records the kill in a session report on BGG website.


The CC Bitch enters Zone 2 over the English channel and encounters a single ME 109 in a vertical dive and a ME 109 at 6 high, Good fighter cover drives off the ME 109 at 6 high

Ken Bradford speaks,

"This one is all mine boys!!!"

This is one of the few times Ken has had a plane to shoot at from the radio room. Adreneline races through him as he lines up the shot, he has the plane in his sight.

He fires and misses!!!

Malloc also fires and he misses as well. The ME 109 fires and also misses!

The CC Bitch approaches the base over England, weather is good and so is morale as a great mission comes to an end as the plane lands safely.

the*mad*gamer wrote:

Can the top turret gun then fire at the German fighter at 12:00 high or is all fire from the B-17 considered simultaneous?

Yes, this the defensive fire is considered simultaneous and you can't switch fire. But you should always be happy when you down an enemy fighter.

Good shooting and bombing on that last mission! Nice job.